~ Poems of Love ~

The following poems have been written by me, for my husband Hamada, who suffered from Multiple Myeloma [IgG Kappa] a cancer of the plasma cells, which are found in the bone marrow. After many months of chemotherapy, contracting pneumonia twice, once given only twelve hours to live and having three bad fractures to his spine and also showing in his Pelvis, he made it to four years seven months. The Multiple Myeloma attacked his Kidneys first showing at diagnosis in May 2006 leaving Hamada only a small percentage of kidney function. He never complained, using his most amazing smile even when I knew he had severe pain. Hamada underwent a Stem Cell Transplant using his own 'harvested stem cells' . During October 2007 he spent seventeen days in the "Centre For Clinical Haematology" at Nottingham City Hospital UK. where he achieved this transplant. We had a scare at six months after transplant, when told 'the beast was back' but subsequent tests showed a partial remission. Again in early 2009 it was confirmed that Hamada was out of remission He fought again during 2010 with newer chemo type drugs. First with Velcade and then with Revlimid but to no avail. His Kidneys were failing further and Hamada chose not to have dialysis. This blog contains poems and updates, written for Hamada, telling of our life together.
Now a beautiful book has been published, see http://www.susiehemingway.com/books/
showing Hamada's personal fight against Multiple Myeloma in the first fifty 'poems of love' written by me his wife. I hope you like these poems of love and also 'our story' dedicated to Hamada, who passed away peacefully at home on 23 November 2010 after a most courageous fight against Multiple Myeloma.

03 June, 2010

Tears At Another Table.



It was an eternal wait that day
a long perpetual tedious episode
an abuse on the senses,
the faces filling the clinic suite
sitting too close together at tables that encumbered,
all appearing the same, all resigned to their fate;
all stricken with disbelief.
I watched…


Can you put aside like dead flowers a mind that is full of fear?
Can you not feel the pain of those set faces that await
the ‘clarion call’ for news no one wishes to hear?
Can you relentlessly show that crumbling smile?
Can you quieten the beating of your own heart?


I watched the woman sitting opposite me, a reflection of myself,
sitting beside her Man, worry etching her face,
quietly waiting the prophecy that could change their lives,
was she to receive news that would set her Man free?
Set them both free!


I watched…I watched…


I watched this fragile life snap and break,
I watched those tears at another table…




All Rights Reserved @ Susie Hemingway 2010

* NB After being on Velcade and Dexamethasone(80mg weekly) since February 22 2010 Hamada's Para-Protein (M-Spike) has only dropped to 15 He is to have a few weeks break and then start with the oral chemotherapy Revlimid.The fight continues.

14 comments:

Dianne West said...

Oh Susie, yet another poem that touches my heart. We’ve seen so many worried faces during these past 4 years. Some times we’ve been in a stable place and I’ve watched others’ painful wait, while other times I have been one with those who wait. But always, we remain stoic and hopeful and positive for our men. Such a burden, but such a privilege, too. We again are waiting – have been referred to a lung doctor after a recent scan. ♥

Raj Virdee said...

Susie you and Hamada are such a shining example of courage, love and positivity to all of us. I pray for Hamadas treatment to go well and our thoughts are with you.

Dave King said...

I don 't know how you did it, but for me you got the sentiments across without slipping into sentimentality.

A Cuban In London said...

This is a very poignant piece. You keep the tension going even if one suspects the outcome. Many thanks.

Greetings from London.

Susie Hemingway said...

Thank you Diane, I am sorry to read of Verns recent problems when he had been doing so well. My thoughts are with you both as you tackle this new addition to the MM.
Love to you both x

Susie Hemingway said...

Thanks Raj for your very kind comments. All our very best wishes to you and your beautiful wife. We hope to see you soon.

Sunshine said...

Best wishes for that ongoing fight... Hope for your journey.

Sandy said...

As we dined out over the weekend, we talked about how we cannot know what is happening to others who 'appear' to be healthy or happy or have put aside their stress for a few hours in a restaurant.
Your poem is a good reminder that we all are "across the table" from those who have their challenges to face, too.
What a poignant reminder to not be too quick to judge others, who may be waiting .... for ... news ... or already have it.

Barbara said...

Susie,
Please know how often I turn to your poetry and blog to find my own strength... so many drugs have changed my husband in so many ways (I sometimes fail to see the man I originally married) and in some ways feel so lost in this journey.. Your words comfort me in more ways than I can express .. warmest regards..

Susie Hemingway said...

My appreciation Dave for taking the time to comment on "Tears At Another Table" It is so very easy at this time for me to write in a too sentimental way. I must learn to reign myself in a tad, discipline the content makes for a more powerful poem.

Susie Hemingway said...

Greetings to you Cuban in London and thank you for your welcome comment.

Susie Hemingway said...

Thank you Sunshine - all very best wishes to you and to Don - him seems to be doing so very well - long may it continue xx

@Sandy.
How right you are Sandy, I watch faces all the time and have tried to reign and control my patience especially with driving on leaving the hospital grounds, always bearing in mind that the driver of the car in front of me may just have had bad news or a procedure making him hesitant or slow to start his/her journey home. Something of the very many things I have learnt on this journey with MM. Watchfulness and Patience, learnt well in these past four years. All fondest wishes.

Susie Hemingway said...

Thank you Barbara for your comments, there is so much more I would like to say to you, I understand very well what you are going through, these are indeed difficult times as much for us the Carers, as the MM sufferer themselves.I am glad that my poems bring some comfort to you. Please feel free to contact me, should you need to chat x
susiehemingway@googlemail.com

Jinksy said...

You capture every emotion with your words.

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