~ Poems of Love ~

The following poems have been written by me, for my husband Hamada, who suffered from Multiple Myeloma [IgG Kappa] a cancer of the plasma cells, which are found in the bone marrow. After many months of chemotherapy, contracting pneumonia twice, once given only twelve hours to live and having three bad fractures to his spine and also showing in his Pelvis, he made it to four years seven months. The Multiple Myeloma attacked his Kidneys first showing at diagnosis in May 2006 leaving Hamada only a small percentage of kidney function. He never complained, using his most amazing smile even when I knew he had severe pain. Hamada underwent a Stem Cell Transplant using his own 'harvested stem cells' . During October 2007 he spent seventeen days in the "Centre For Clinical Haematology" at Nottingham City Hospital UK. where he achieved this transplant. We had a scare at six months after transplant, when told 'the beast was back' but subsequent tests showed a partial remission. Again in early 2009 it was confirmed that Hamada was out of remission He fought again during 2010 with newer chemo type drugs. First with Velcade and then with Revlimid but to no avail. His Kidneys were failing further and Hamada chose not to have dialysis. This blog contains poems and updates, written for Hamada, telling of our life together.
Now a beautiful book has been published, see http://www.susiehemingway.com/books/
showing Hamada's personal fight against Multiple Myeloma in the first fifty 'poems of love' written by me his wife. I hope you like these poems of love and also 'our story' dedicated to Hamada, who passed away peacefully at home on 23 November 2010 after a most courageous fight against Multiple Myeloma.

26 July, 2007

A Good Improvement




Hamada has made a good improvement over the past week - very weak - but so much better.
Now starting his next course of 'Chemo'. Many thanks to Amr our Nephew, who made the journey,thanks to Jo, to see his Uncle and spent time with him having so much fun catching-up and chatting together in their 'Arabic' and playing backgammon together. It was a wonderful tonic for Hamada. Even managing a drive to the beach and a walk! with the boys support.

22 July, 2007

Home Again

Hamada and Ian

Hamada returned home after an eight day stay in Lincoln Hospital, he is still weak but so much better after the good care and attention received . Thanks to the amazing team in A and E - also to Mr Bowen and particularly to the young house Doctor - he knows- without naming- who went to extraordinary lengths to help sort out the many problems that arose - especially with the medications. Thanks also to the great team of nurses on 'Dixon', we could never do without your continuing patience and superb care. How grateful we are.

12 July, 2007

I Wish I Could Untangle You - July 2007




See twinkling eyes that dull with pain
eyes once bright as fire flames
we juggle pills to make it wane
with every day I cry for you


moving now is hard to do
limbs get stuck refusing to
unbend, and move as graceful should,
I wish I could untangle you


dreams that see you run again
walk the miles that never end
play the games we used to do
dance forever, just us two


this once strong man
who laughs with me
now has morphine in his tea
instead of 'bubbles' in a glass
thinking of sweet days gone past,


still we can dance, if very slow
so legs don't stumble, I'll
not let you go, put on
the music, hold me tight
and yes, it still feels very right

we'll play the soft and gentle songs
the ones you love, we'll float along,
I'll watch your singing eyes
and wish I could, until I die,


I wish I could untangle you
I wish.... I could untangle you






@ Copyright 2007


Back To Hospital !

After a good consultation with Prof Russell and feeling happy about the plans for further treatment, Hamada was very unwell during Tuesday night, and after rather a panic ,was rushed at 4am by ambulance back to Lincoln where he has been re-admitted. He is stable and has been sedated for most of the day he will be there until further notice, a check by the Haematology Team today will tell more. Thank you to the wonderful paramedics who once again did a sterling job, so fast getting to us and so very efficient

10 July, 2007

Lincoln Hospital

A better visit today at Lincoln Hospital, a consultation with Prof N Russell of Nottingham City Hospital prove to be more promising. The Professor would like Hamada to continue with the current Chemotherapy regime for two more monthly cycles and hopefully reduce the levels again, to proceed to a stem cell transplant in late September, as he does have enough stem cells collected now. This has really pleased us,as we have a date to work towards. Hamada feels far more positive this evening and that works for me.

Thanks to all the kind staff we met again today- they all work so hard- and lovely smiles are always found for all their patients. Our thanks to you all.


Again thanks for all the recent messages from friends and relations in different parts of the globe, you never fail to amaze me with your great wishes of encouragement, they really do help to keep Hamada cheerful and they do lift his spirits so.

06 July, 2007

And The Music Played.....


So you found that quiet place
where lights were dim
and I was dressed in lace,
this boulevard of strangers
just the perfect place,
the candles melted slowly
Oh! your handsome face.

You found that quiet place
when you took me in your arms
the slowness of the music
you, and all your charms,
I'd left my heart behind me,
but then the music played.

So slowly we turned, on
this tiny wooden floor
I believed I had been here
just once before,
the closeness of you, in
this boulevard of strangers,
and yes, the music played.

So you found that quiet place
with little tables and wine to drink
nothing more, no broken dreams,
no promises, or time to think,
just you and some magic
and the music played.

So I left my soul behind me
and suddenly, I was free,
and the music played...
@Copyright 2007

04 July, 2007

The Daily Task !


The daily task and extra to this! are all the Chemotherapy Drugs Hamada is taking everyday in his battle to overcome his illness. Hamada is a little better this week but he has bone pain, which we are getting almost under control. He thanks everyone for their lovely messages of encouragement. he remains cheerful but thoughtful.

01 July, 2007

Such is the Pain Of Love

I drive across the fields of gold
the tears upon my cheeks not old
to leave him in this place so strange,
such is the pain of love,

this quiet gentle smiling man
whose eyes can hardly understand,
I breathe his courage, I live his fear,
such is the pain of love

he looks at me with eyes of love
to find a power from above,
I cannot fail, I cannot falter,
such is the pain of love,

why oh why, this wretched time
should pick this dear and sweetest man
when worlds have met as ours have done
for all of this to be undone
such is the pain of love,

but still we'll fight and fight
to push the boundaries back,
we'll lean together to gain more strength,
to learn and listen, and to wait,

this is the pain of love...


@ Copyright 2007

Today from Jewel, Long Beach California US

Today, at 10.45 p.s.t. at Thubten Dhargye Ling approximately 100 friends will say prayers for Hamada.

We thank you all.

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