~ Poems of Love ~

The following poems have been written by me, for my husband Hamada, who suffered from Multiple Myeloma [IgG Kappa] a cancer of the plasma cells, which are found in the bone marrow. After many months of chemotherapy, contracting pneumonia twice, once given only twelve hours to live and having three bad fractures to his spine and also showing in his Pelvis, he made it to four years seven months. The Multiple Myeloma attacked his Kidneys first showing at diagnosis in May 2006 leaving Hamada only a small percentage of kidney function. He never complained, using his most amazing smile even when I knew he had severe pain. Hamada underwent a Stem Cell Transplant using his own 'harvested stem cells' . During October 2007 he spent seventeen days in the "Centre For Clinical Haematology" at Nottingham City Hospital UK. where he achieved this transplant. We had a scare at six months after transplant, when told 'the beast was back' but subsequent tests showed a partial remission. Again in early 2009 it was confirmed that Hamada was out of remission He fought again during 2010 with newer chemo type drugs. First with Velcade and then with Revlimid but to no avail. His Kidneys were failing further and Hamada chose not to have dialysis. This blog contains poems and updates, written for Hamada, telling of our life together.
Now a beautiful book has been published, see http://www.susiehemingway.com/books/
showing Hamada's personal fight against Multiple Myeloma in the first fifty 'poems of love' written by me his wife. I hope you like these poems of love and also 'our story' dedicated to Hamada, who passed away peacefully at home on 23 November 2010 after a most courageous fight against Multiple Myeloma.

28 May, 2008

Pain and Marchpane - by Susie Hemingway


You're just as sweet as almond marzipan
like marchpane on a silver platter,
your feverish eyes in twinkling glimmer,
tell me the story, in never wasted chatter.

I look in on the tableau,and my eyes
can read your heart,
your pain is like a serpent,
a limbless reptile beast,
who once again returns,
when we expect him least.

Come, bring the Charmer and his pipe
to lure with his music,
to draw away the carrying pain
as he worms his way in coiling.

Come! see if I can sway this serpent!
and charm him from this 'marchpane'
I have the need to slay this beast
for my eyes can read your heart,
for my eyes can read your heart;

but YOUR eyes can see my soul...


All Rights Reserved.
Marzipan photo kind permission of Mitch Erickson
with thanks.


23 May, 2008

Interesting - Perhaps?

As I try to read all the latest news regarding articles on Multiple Myeloma from the Mayo Clinic. http://www.mayoclinic.org/ I thought this information might be worth passing on, it sounds at the very least, most interesting - take a look at http://www.mayoclinic.org/news2008-sct/4794.html - the intriguing contents are certainly worth a glance. Then of course discuss with your Specialist . I would be grateful for your comments on this.

21 May, 2008

Family Visits





What a nice long weekend spent at 'Hemingway' with our eldest Son, enchanting Daughter-in-Law and very special Grandson. Just a simple weekend gathering, with some good food, and good conversation. My lovely Sister and Brother-in-Law joining us too and Hamada was able to spend precious time with our Grandson, and listening to their laughter and fun was a complete joy. Simple pleasures create such vivid memories in a child's mind. Our Grandson understands how ill his Grandpa is, he has been told as much as we know, following every step of the way, often adding health advice of his own - "don't forget kidney beans Grandpa, to help with your kidneys"! We all believe this is the only way for him to deal with this major upset to his little life when the time comes. From the word go, even when he was quite tiny, they developed a very special bond together, spending many fun times and quiet moments in each others company, creating an enviable friendship. His little eyes always sparkle at his Grandpa's words and the fun they have developed together over these eight years delights him so. Hamada has many things he wishes to say to this little lad that admires him so much. May he have plenty of time to say them ...

12 May, 2008

Something To Soothe.

Hamada enjoying the Sun this week.

As everyone who knows me will testify, I am a great lover of music. Two very lovely songs have come to my ears this week, both will calm and soothe all who need it. So many of my friends who read this blog need such comfort I know. Do try the wonderful "Beloved" and "Coming back to Life" sung so beautifully by Minnie Driver. Both from her Album: Sea Stories.

09 May, 2008

** The Beast is Back ! **

Such sad news came to us yesterday at Hamada's regular clinic at Lincoln County Hospital. The result of the recent Bence Jones test - which is one of the markers used - is at 0.13 which means that, although Hamada underwent a Stem Cell Transplant last October he has only achieved six months remission! The beast is back and the Myeloma is active again. This is devastating news, and with the knowledge that at long last his white cell count is up at 4.05 and he was getting stronger against infections, we had so hoped his remission would have been much longer than this. Hamada has now been offered Velcade ( but not yet awhile), a proteasome inhibitor which is used for people who have previously been treated with chemotherapy and have relapsed. Therefore we will start once again with the battle to fight this wretched disease.

01 May, 2008

Two Years ~ Anniversary of Diagnosis by Susie Hemingway.


Two years, you made two years,
how simply sublime,
my days passed like a struggling river
pushing its direction to the sea,
the fast and furious moments sealed
in vaults of crashing tormented resolve
but stored with crystal clarity.

I stand on the islet like Ishmael
throwing all vehement thoughts in
the stream, torrents of anger,
this sense of sadness
I lay before you and
the currents carry them forth.

Two years, two years!
the river found it hard, the
dams and sluices got in it's way,
but it's power pushed them back,
do not give way, my troth intact,
my rage is rushing to the Sea,
for each tiny droplet of strength gathered
will fill the Ocean...


@ Copyright 2008
Photo Courtesy of Matt Rutherford
http://www.mattrutherford.com/ all rights reserved.

Update

As the UK bank holiday approaches, we wish all our friends and family a fun spring weekend.
Hamada continues well without any serious problems to attend to. His recovery from his recent bout with pneumonia has been very slow. Most days Hamada returns to sleep, waking only for lunch and then he gets up in the afternoon. I believe he is getting a little stronger, but cannot manage more, he is still very weak. He enjoys some television, light reading and an occasional game of cards, still managing to beat us! He does enjoy all his meals eating really well, he has recently put on some weight and has now reach a remarkable 58kg. He does not venture out much, only for the Hospital visits, but as the weather becomes warmer the garden will beckon d.v. Love to you all from us both.

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